Off the Record: WA Police timeline cleansers and a tribute to Cristiano Ronaldo

TIMELINE CLEANSERS Working for a newspaper, you get a shocking insight into the level of detritus that finds its way onto social media. Off the Record is not talking about mudslinging from anonymous accounts, but real-life local people putting their name to abhorrent comments. An increasingly important part of our job is keeping an eye on these comments and moderating them when necessary. But instead of giving oxygen to the people who keep us busy with their disgraceful social media antics, OTR wants to give a shoutout to WA Police — a force for good on Twitter. It might seem counterintuitive but police officers have made a habit of providing the feel-good, wholesome content that reminds you not everything is anger and insult. Last month, for example, Kojonup police shared the tale of a rather large dog named Bianca. Police were originally called out to help Bianca’s elderly owner, but they also found time to help the pooch, who it turns out was suffering from an overgrown toenail. Thank you to the cops from across the Great Southern for those much-needed timeline cleansers. LONG LIVE RONALDO In today’s business section, you’ll find a story about Tony’s Albany, the local institution that has just left its York Street premises after more than 60 years. That is not the end of Tony’s, but rather a new beginning, with the salon moving just down the road to Albany Highway. As well as being a part of local business history, Tony’s is home to a very fervent soccer fan. Joe Romero — the son of the titular Tony — has been passionate about cutting hair ever since his father showed him around a pair of scissors in 1964. OTR would imagine he has been passionate about soccer since he was big enough to see over the top of a ball. It just so happens that yours truly is also a disciple of The Beautiful Game, so a 10-minute haircut usually descends — or ascends, OTR would argue — into a 20-minute discussion of Europe’s major leagues. To get to the point, it has been a fair while between haircuts and there is something OTR needs to do — gloat. Joe, you see, is a Juventus man, while OTR has been hunting glory with Manchester United since the 1990s. It has been a testing year for both of our clubs, but Juve are clearly in a better position. Indeed, the current Manchester United side has to be the worst performing of the Premier League era. Juventus is about to play in a cup final, while United will be lucky to scrape into next year’s Europa League. So there is nothing to gloat about there. However OTR seems to remember Joe being critical of one Cristiano Ronaldo, who acquitted himself very well at Juventus despite being criticised by some fans. Ronaldo came under a similar brand of fire when he started at United, with pundits pointing at him as a reason for the team’s lack of cohesion and success. Well, the season is now nearing its end and Ronaldo has been one of United’s only success stories, bagging 18 Premier League goals and six in the Champions League. At the age of 37, he has been the angel ring of hope that has kept fans afloat in a sea of mediocrity. Siu!